Mighty Kindness

Zero Circle- RUMI

Be helpless, dumbfounded,
Unable to say yes or no.
Then a stretcher will come from grace
to gather us up.

We are too dull-eyed to see that beauty.
If we say we can, we’re lying.
If we say No, we don’t see it,
That No will behead us
And shut tight our window onto spirit.

So let us rather not be sure of anything,
Beside ourselves, and only that, so
Miraculous beings come running to help.
Crazed, lying in a zero circle, mute,
We shall be saying finally,
With tremendous eloquence, Lead us.
When we have totally surrendered to that beauty,
We shall be a mighty kindness

Love your Enemies

In 2006 I was managing an eleven story high rise apartment building. There was one guest that had been notified she could no longer be on the property but continued to visit anyway, and each time was taken into custody by the police for trespassing. On a quiet September afternoon I was informed that this woman was in the building and causing problems. I went to the apartment where she was, spoke with her, and waited with her for the police to arrive and take her into custody. I could tell that she was more volatile than any of the other times we’d had contact. Ultimately she lost control and hit my leasing agent in the face. When I attempted to distract her she grabbed me and dragged me across the floor by my hair. She then proceeded to attempt to break my neck, an action she nearly accomplished. As she was screaming every filthy word I’d ever heard, inches from my face, along with her intentions of my demise I suddenly began screaming for God to save me. The next door neighbor heard all the screaming, came in, and managed to remove her arm from the back of my neck and I was then able to get her hands out of my hair. I was finally free. I was taken to the emergency room at the hospital and it was discovered that I had a serious neck and back injury that were non-repairable. 

The following day I was arrested due to an active warrant discovered the previous day. Ultimately the charges were seen as the false accusations they were from a very angry, hatred filled former supervisor but it took a year to straighten it all out. I then had a serious neck and back injury and criminal charges to deal with. Two weeks later one of my very best friends died very suddenly and that pushed me over the edge. At that time and again six months later I determined I simply had nothing left and decided to end my life. However, both times I realized that I could not do that to my son so I stopped and began screaming out my anger and frustration to God, to Jesus, to anyone who might listen. I wasn’t sure at that point anyone was listening.

I began to look for ways to deal with everything as feelings of hopelessness took over. I then began to recall the words of Jesus when he said we are to love our enemies and pray for them. I felt moved to begin to pray for the man pressing criminal charges against me but I fought against that. I just couldn’t do it but Jesus wouldn’t let me go. Finally I began to pray for this man. I began asking God to bless him and to make his life successful. Daily I prayed that he would find peace from the rage that lived in him and had become a part of him. At first I didn’t mean a word of it but as time went on and I continued to pray for him I began to feel less anger. I began to feel compassion for him, and ultimately I began to really believe in the prayers I was offering up on his behalf. I discovered that Jesus’ command to love our enemies was real and that there was great power and peace to be found if we followed his direction. 

Matthew 5:43-44 You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.  

~Jean Harris

Obligations and Reminders

“We take our lead from Christ, who is the source of everything we do.  He keeps us in step with each other.  His very breath and blood flow through us, nourishing us so that we will grow up healthy in God, robust in love.”  (Ephesians 4: 16  The Message)

It was yet another obligation to fulfill. 

As a part of the Missional Church Consultative Initiative offered by the Minnesota Annual Conference I was on the road early on a Tuesday morning to attend the pastor’s monthly trainings that are part of the experience. All the way to the meeting in Minneapolis I muttered to myself about the scarcity of time.  The day before Ash Wednesday was a crazy time to have to be out and about!  There was a staff meeting to run, and countless emails to write and ushers to find for worship and and and…   As you can imagine, the state of my being was a bit like the cloud that followed Pigpen in the Peanuts cartoons.

I rolled into the meeting after stopping for a double-shot latte and had a bit of time before my colleagues arrived.  The woman who is our coach was there and she greeted me like I was some sort of walking miracle.  Her warm delight in my presence got through the funk surrounding me.  She asked me how I was and I answered honestly that I was feeling grumpy and overwhelmed by the so-much of ministry.

She listened.  Her eyes told me that she heard me.  She didn’t try to talk me out of my sense of overwhelmed but instead allowed me to be beleaguered and sad and all the other things that can walk in a human on a dense day.

And then she began our clergy time together with a scripture verse that seemed tailor-made for the wounds of my soul. She shared the verse printed above and she named to reality that each day is irreplaceable and never to be repeated.  She spoke of how it is God’s grace drenches all of our being:  the tired and parched places, the jaggedy and hurting places, the overdone and underprepared places.

I felt held and blessed and the cloud of angst settled around me and was replaced with a hum of gratitude.  Christ is the source of everything we do, everything I do.  So how is it I will allow his very breath and blood to flow through me?

Truly, truly I seek to live a life healthy in God, robust in love.

 Sometimes I just need to be reminded.

~Pastor Elizabeth

The Grace of Love and Honesty

I cringed when my friend shared God’s love and grace with me.

Penny and I were best friends in high school in Hawaii.  We each had moved away from the Islands, and were back for our 40^th reunion—the first reunion I had attended since graduation.  We have kept in touch sporadically over the years, as she became a banker in New York, and then in Hong Kong and I became a Family Doctor in Massachusetts, Texas and Minnesota.  We each had been an attendant in the others’ wedding, and we are still married to our first husband.  The children are out of our houses now, and we each have moved on from our most intensive, busy career.  It was a good time to reconnect.

On the way to the airport Penny told me there was something that she wanted to tell me, and mentally I took a deep breath,  because I had a feeling that I might not like what she was going to say.  She said that our friendship is very important to her, and that when I am silent she worries that she is losing my friendship.  I see that there are implications of not nurturing a friendship—that she and I both lose when I get so busy that I prioritize other tasks ahead of sharing and receiving love.  We affirmed our friendship, and our desire to remain close friends, despite the miles separating us.

I feel sad to hear that I caused her distress, and I feel so grateful that she was willing to tell me, in an extremely loving way, how I could be a better friend to her.  This is God’s grace of forgiveness and unconditional love, conveyed through the love and honesty of my friend.  I am more attentive now to the importance of connecting with family and friends.  Though there are still many tasks and details of life to juggle, they are not going to eclipse my connections to friends and family.


 ~Connie Williams

Ephesians 4:15 . . . by speaking the truth with love, let’s grow in every way into Christ.

John 8:31-3You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teaching.  Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.

Transformed - Suffering

You’re Blessed

Matthew  5: 1–12 MSG 

5 ^1-2 When Jesus saw his ministry drawing huge crowds, he climbed a hillside. Those who were apprenticed to him, the committed, climbed with him. Arriving at a quiet place, he sat down and taught his climbing companions. This is what he said:

³ “You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.

⁴ “You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.

⁵ “You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.

⁶ “You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best meal you’ll ever eat.

⁷ “You’re blessed when you care. At the moment of being ‘care-full,’ you find yourselves cared for.

⁸ “You’re blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.

⁹ “You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.

¹⁰ “You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom.

^11-12 “Not only that—count yourselves blessed every time people put you down or throw you out or speak lies about you to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and they are uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—give a cheer, even!—for though they don’t like it, I do! And all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good

company. My prophets and witnesses have always gotten

into this kind of trouble

The Beatitudes

Matthew  5: 1–12  NRSV 

When Jesus saw the crowds, he went up the mountain; and after he sat down, his disciples came to him. Then he began to speak, and taught them, saying:

 ‘Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 ‘Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

 ‘Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

 ‘Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

 ‘Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.

 ‘Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

 ‘Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

 ‘Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 ‘Blessed are you when people revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

 transformed:

 suf·fer·ing