I would like to begin my devotional thoughts with the words that one should use when properly relating a story. Now, I know that most of you are under the belief that the proper words used to begin telling a story are “Once upon a time…” Now, if that is your tradition, well, I guess that’s okay and everything, but if you are one of the few of who has ever served in the military… (especially the army, we really love this in the army) you really know that the truly proper way to relate a story, particularly a story relating a personal anecdote, is not to say “Once upon a time”, but rather to use the more appropriate verbiage of “So there I was….” If you really want to add a dramatic effect to your story, you can add the words “knee-deep in” whatever it was that you were knew deep in. With this fine American tradition in mind, I would like to share my personal experiences and devotional with you, my new church family.
So, there I was, knee deep in working in my full-time counseling internship, running Josh to piano lessons, scout meetings and ski club, and trying to find out what classes Abby is registering for in school next year, and trying to get her to find some other work to do, because you know that Bella trip isn’t going to pay for itself. Then there are the bills that need to be paid, and I think I may have forgotten about a doctor’s appointment for Abby, and I really need to get going on finding letters of recommendation, because I really, really need to find a job as a counselor next year, and I really, really don’t want to leave my home to go somewhere else and start all over again after living in five states… I don’t want to put the kids through that, because I remember how hard it was for me as a kid not to have a place to call home, and please, God, can’t this finally be our home?
So there I was, knee-deep in all of it when Lael sent me this on Facebook instant message. Hi there! We are putting together a lay focused Lenten devotional, and we would love your voice. Are you interested in writing a short devotion - something that calls you closer to God, or some way that faith gives you strength? Our Lenten theme is transformation if you find that inspiring!
So there I was, knee deep in everything that was going on in my life, and God, it’s just so busy that…. Can I take a moment to reflect on how God has come into my life, and transformed me and my family? I have so many things to take care of, but God has been so very, very good to me, and has brought so much joy and purpose and hope into my life as I undergo the transformation from recruiter to counselor, from serving my country to serving the kids in my community.
Who am I that God saw fit to ask me to play an active role in the future of my new church home? Who am I that I’ve been asked to be part of the process to help our church’s young men and women? Who am I? I don’t know why this is happening to me… I’m just a student trying to start on a new career, trying to take care of my family and make sure that I’m doing right by them… Trying to right by my wife, by my kids, by the clients and students I serve... How is it that all of a sudden I’m beginning to feel important to the world around me? That I’m beginning to see that I’m really making a difference? I can’t be that important. I’m just a guy…
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So there I was, knee-deep in the midst of all of this chaos, when this simple request forced me to quiet my mind and heart, and to be still, if only for a moment, and to focus on what God wanted from me, and how much He has truly blessed me and given me…
This was supposed to be a short reflection and I guess, being the grad student that I am, I may be adding on more words than I anticipated. As I write these words, I begin to feel a tinge of guilt, because I know that up until this point I haven’t cited any references in APA format… I kind of think that God is telling me that at this point, that’s okay, because this paper, these words, at this moment in time… These are not for a grade, or a professor, or to prove a point. These words are not meant as a moment of judgment, but as a moment of thanks. So, I guess I should say, thank you, Father, for holding me up through the busy days. Thank you, Father, for helping me to find a purpose and for trusting me to help others in this troubled world we live in. Thank you for believing in me, even when I sometimes have trouble believing in You, because I’m always so busy. Thank you for giving me this assignment to rediscover all the ways that I am blessed and for rediscovering the wonder of a quiet moment of reflection.
I want to wrap up with a quote that just popped in my head as I wrote these words down. I wish I could say I was more of a biblical scholar, but I’m afraid that’s not the case. Actually, the quote that popped in my head was from, of all places, the 80’s rock group The Cars, and it goes “I guess you’re just what I needed.” I guess, at this particular time, in the midst of all this busy-ness, that just what I needed was a little push to reflect about how blessed I feel today. Thank you, God, for helping me realize that, I hope that You won’t judge me too harshly if I don’t properly cite that lyric using APA format. Happy Lent, to all of you. I hope that you too are able to find some time to reflect on how God has blessed your life as well.
~Dan Lindenfeld
